Rishikesh, India is considered a Holy City; it is a mecca for aspiring yogis, sadhus/babas and spiritual seekers. The land has seen diverse cultures and people, and at the same time, it has witnessed, crimes against individuals who have been oblivious to the reality that not all those who are in religious robes are motivated by love.
During my first visit, there was an incident, which occurred during Holi (a religious festival), a female tourist was allegedly raped by a baba. It is my understanding that babas are people who leave their homes of origin and go to Holy Lands, to seek and find god and freedom from the material world. However, in my view, some of the babas that I have crossed paths with are inauthentic. Again, it is my opinion that some of them are addicts who feel victimised by their circumstances, and are thus, seeking a free pass in life, and find it in the unsuspecting good-natured foreigners who feel compelled to give money to them which in turn feeds their smoking and alcoholic addictions.
This may sound, cold to some, but this is my opinion at the time of this writing. The alleged rape incident shook the protective mother in me. I could not help but feel empathy towards this goddess who was violated. I sent her love and continued with my life.
And one fateful Saturday morning, I went to River Ganga, to connect with the land and to ground myself by walking on sand. I was not alone. I was on the beach, and there were few other people there. I was dressed modestly, in an ankle length dress, and a light jacket, for it was windy, and there was still a chill in the air. It was March 2020, the day before national lockdown. There was a couple that I noticed who were trotting about in shallow waters, a woman who was meditating and numerous cows.
I sat on a big rock and watched the flowing water. There was stillness and I felt very grateful for the gift. I also looked across the river and noticed four men, bathing in the river. I admired their courage, for Ganga’s water is cold.
I suddenly felt an urgency to disturb my contemplation and leave. I followed my intuition, since I have learned to trust my inner voice. And so I stood up from my sanctuary and moved in the direction of my home. I noticed a baba, in the distance, and felt a sensation that triggered my flight or fight response. I couldn’t decide what to do at that point yet, but I felt guided to avoid him. And I took the lower path, since he was taking the higher road and he was moving in my direction. We moved past each other and as soon as he was behind me, I ran up the hill.
That is when I noticed that he was following me. He said, “Namaste”. And I did not respond. He repeated a few times. And I said hello back because at that point I wanted to give him the benefit of doubt for this man had done nothing but say hello. And then he continued to speak in his language, I obviously could not understand. And I continued walking and increased my pace. And then he said, “I love you”. I was utterly perplexed.
He was below me, and I turned around to see what he was doing. And he held his genitals, which were, thankfully, not exposed but were concealed behind his orange robes and blanket, and made a gesture which suggested that he and I should get it on right there on the beach. I was enraged. I realised that the only words that he had said that were comprehensible to me, are ‘Namaste’ and ‘I love you’. And I imagined that he’s a predator, prowling the riverbanks for unsuspecting foreign women, whom he thinks are so starved of love, that they will do anything, or be taken anywhere. I responded to him and said, leave me alone. And I looked him in the eye and repeated the same. And he did not move.
And then, like a warrior princess, I picked up my weapon of choice in that moment, which were small stones. I had the advantage of standing on higher ground. So I hurled my stones at him with power and love for myself. I also thought about the women who have come across this man, before this day and those who are destined to meet him in the future. I wished to remind him that women are not victims, we are warriors and we will fight back. I watched triumphantly, as he turned his back and ran away.
I did not know it at that time that I would stone one more man who would cross paths with me, and try to make uninvited sexual advances at me.
I walk around with a stick, sometimes with little pebbles in my bag because I’m not willing to stop living. I’m not willing to stop walking in broad daylight, because there are some sick men out there, but I will remind them that stones and sticks might break their bones.
